


what you see (when you look at the sky)

by necking



Series: don't you worry i can handle it [1]
Category: Power Rangers (2017)
Genre: Angst, F/F, im gay and predictable ok, ofc its a fuckin curious (hayley kiyoko 2018) fic, tbh i dont Think its rated M but i just wanna b safe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-02
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2019-03-12 20:49:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13555314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/necking/pseuds/necking
Summary: The first time she saw her, she knew she was ruined.





	what you see (when you look at the sky)

**Author's Note:**

> u bet ur entire ASS i wrote a curious fic...,,,, i was thinking it u were thinking it we were ALL THINKING IT!!!!! 
> 
> anyway this is meant to be a continuation of my angst fic from trimberly week day 2 called 'please be mine' but it could also stand alone on its own tbh
> 
> thank u @lady-of-the-sun for validatin me on this and @fashsm for making this not sound as fake deep as it probably wouldve been if she hadnt read it. amen
> 
> i didnt read some scenes over tbh so like........,,,,,, lmk if something is up

The first time she saw her, she knew she was ruined. 

It wasn’t that she was unsure, or confused; no, it was the opposite.

She’d known for quite some time, but her facade was already crumbling, and meeting Trini for the first time had pulled back Kimberly Hart’s pushed down thoughts to the front of her mind.

Maybe it hadn’t been when the school year started, when they’d been put in the same biology class-- Kim hadn’t even seen her then. How blind she had to have been. She couldn’t imagine not having the tiny girl on her radar 24/7.

Maybe it was when they’d fallen together into the water, and she’d witnessed Trini’s glance (or maybe glare would be a better word) firsthand.

Kimberly had never been a fan of science, that much was true from her straight D’s in her mandatory high school science classes, but Trini had so many stars in her eyes it made Kim want to learn more about astronomy in an attempt to understand her better.

Realistically, she _knew_ what these feelings meant, and even with her reputation gone, she couldn’t bring herself to accept them.

“Kim? Baby?”

“Sorry, Jace, what’d you say?”

 _Right_. She was supposed to be making out with her boyfriend. She hadn’t even noticed he stopped his movements.

He chuckled at her cluelessness, unaware of the emotional turmoil going on in his girlfriend’s head, “‘was just asking if you wanted to stay over.”

“Sure, yeah,” she said mindlessly, and then he shrugged, continuing his ministrations on her neck when she tilted her head upwards for better access.

So why couldn’t she let Trini go?

-

_“You’ve been avoiding me,”_

_“Have I?”_

_What they had had been going on for some time now, but it’d never been this bad._

_The first time they let it happen, Kim had her mind set on the fact that she’d never let it happen again. She’d fallen straight into the arms of Jason Scott, who was always ready to catch her._

_Meanwhile, the smaller girl wasn’t as lucky. No one was there to break her fall, and she was left to pick up the pieces that the oblivious football player would never know about-- like the fact that Kim’s mind had not been set._

_“Yes,” Kim said, pulling Trini into the closest vacant room, blocking the door so that she couldn’t escape, “and I wanna know why, T.”_

_The door shut now, the two girls sat in silence and Kim knew Trini was trying to wait it out, hoping for Kim to just decide to let her go when it was clear that Trini didn’t want to talk about this._

Friday I’m in Love _played in the background, albeit slightly muffled from their secluded spot in Tommy Oliver’s room, a slight reminder of the party that was still going on outside._

_“C’mon,” Kim prodded, not wanting to take the silence any longer, “say something.”_

_“Why am I here, Kim?”_

_“We need to talk.” She thought that was clear._

_“I thought that was the one rule we had--_ never talk about it _.”_

Right. _“I know, but can’t you just tell me what’s wrong?”_

_“You mean why’ve I stopped coming to meet with you?” Trini deadpanned, and Kim felt her blood go cold at her bluntness._

_“That’s not-” Kim started, but stopped herself. “-well, yes. What changed?”_

_“I don’t know, Kim,” Trini said, and it was obvious shit was gonna hit the fan in the next statement, “maybe I’m just starting to realize how fucked up all this is.”_

_A dull pain in her chest left Kim slightly breathless, and she found herself struggling not to wince at the sudden attack. “‘This?’”_

_“Us, Kim,” she repeated, “we’re fucked up-- the fact that there’s_ even _an us itself, is fucked up.”_

_The words stung. Logically, Trini was making sense, but Kim had lost her senses ages ago._

_“... But I thought you were okay with it?”_

_“No, I was okay with it the first time-- you were figuring out what you wanted,” Trini explained, trying not to let her anger get ahead of her, “but the next few times? Not so much.”_

_She knew it was a dumb question, but she needed to understand, “how do you mean?”_

_“How do I mean-?” Trini repeated, laughing humorouslessly at Kim’s oblivion, “I can’t do this anymore.”_

_“Can’t what?”_

_“I can’t keep watching you two be_ together _anymore,” she said, her voice cracking, and Kim felt her heartstrings rip straight from their sockets at the sound, “he touches you like I want to, and it hurts.”_

_Another beat of silence. What Kim was expecting, she didn’t know. She’d just wanted answers-- but maybe she was meant to have left them in the dark._

_“I’m sorry.”_

_Instead of blowing up like she should’ve, Trini only sighed._

_“I know,” the shorter girl said, sounding defeated. “It wasn’t just you.”_

_It felt like a dismissal, Trini’s words having sounded final, and Kim almost let the other girl out, but it felt wrong to leave it there._

_Then, the smaller girl made her way to the door, intending to leave, but Kim hadn’t budged. She couldn’t._

_“What do you want from me?” She asked, when it was clear Kim wouldn’t let her go._

_Kim gulped, trying to find the right words to fix this, to make it better._

_It was like everything had been destroyed since that night, and she was hoping for at least some kind of change, whether it was to put everything back to the way it was, or just a point in the right direction._

_Trini waited expectantly. Kim felt her chest get tighter with every second. The longer she waited, the smaller her chances were at redeeming herself._

_“You,” she finally replied on impulse. She wasn’t the greatest at thinking through her actions, and besides, there seemed to be no possible way to fix the situation at hand, anyway._

_It was tense between the two of them, Kim trying to focus on anything else that wasn’t Trini’s intense gaze, or the guilt gnawing at the pit of her stomach._

_“No, you don’t.”_

_“I do, I swear, I’m sorry it took so long for me to realize,” Kim started, “but it was always you.”_

_Trini finally looked away then, her indifferent facade starting to crumble, “no, it wasn’t- isn’t, Kim.”_

_“How would you know?”_

_“Because if you did,” she said. “You wouldn’t keep talking to him like that.”_

_And with that, Kim let Trini out, suddenly feeling the emptiness of the room._

-

“Kim?”

Kim ceased her movements with her mascara wand, sitting back to stare at Jason’s expectant glance in her mirror’s reflection. She hadn’t noticed the sounds from the television had stopped, his game paused.

“What?” She asked, realizing he’d asked her a question.

“Are we going to Trini’s tonight?”

She stuck the wand back into the tube, setting her mascara down to retouch her eyeliner, even though she’d had it perfectly applied no less than ten minutes ago.

“Um,” she coughed, clearing her throat after her voice cracked, “yeah, why wouldn’t we?”

He gave her a concerned look, before dropping his controller onto the floor, and briefly brushing his pants down to make his way over to her.

“I don’t know, it just seems like…” he trailed off, seemingly trying to find the right words to say. By now, he was standing behind her with his cheek on hers, arms wrapped around her shoulders, so that they were now staring at each other’s reflections in Kim’s vanity.

“Seems like what?” Kim prodded, her eyeliner pen now forgotten on the table.

He scratched the back of his head. “Like you guys had a fight? You don’t need to talk about it, if you don’t want to.”

She froze. There was no way he could know about what happened-- unless Trini had said something. But she wouldn’t have, right? Besides, that was weeks ago, and the two of them had made up since then.

“No, there was no fight,” Kim said, choosing not to volunteer any information, “we’re fine.”

He gave her a curious glance. “Are you sure?”

“I mean, yeah, there was a little thing,” she sighed, trying to seem done with the topic before he could start asking any more questions. “Just girl stuff. But we’re fine now. It’s fixed.”

“... Okay,” he said, clearly not wanting to discuss whatever ‘girl stuff’ might entail.

“Okay.”

“Cool.”

There was a brief pause, Kim on edge, while Jason chewed on the bottom of his lip awkwardly, his mind already on another topic.

“Wanna make out until the party, then?”

Typical. Even though he was the leader of the team, he _was_ still a teenage boy.

“Sure.”

-

They were only about five minutes away from Trini’s before Kim started to regret her choice in wardrobe.

“I’m kind of cold.”

“It’s like, thirty degrees.”

Kim pouted at him. Normally, she wouldn’t press on the matter, but the realization of wearing a _yellow_ spaghetti strap to Trini’s party was starting to seem like a _terrible_ idea. She _needed_ Jason’s sweatshirt.

He glanced at her briefly, checking in on her sudden silence, then did a double take, noticing she was upset that he hadn’t offered his sweater.

“I’d offer you my hoodie,” he started, trying to defend himself “but since _someone_ made us a little late, I forgot to throw on an undershirt.”

It was true. She’d gotten a little carried away during their make out session, having been desperately trying to push Trini and her guilt away from her mind.

She sighed dejectedly, sinking into her seat. “Right. Yeah, sorry.”

“It’s okay, babe,” he chuckled, parking the car a few houses down the street from Trini’s. It was mildly surprising that they found a spot this close when they were late to the party, what with Zack having planned the guestlist. “We’re here now. I can keep you warm until we get inside.”

Kim smiled weakly, and Jason nodded, hopping out of the car and running over to the passenger side to open the door for her.

“C’mon, princess,” he said, his arms wide open after the door had been opened, “your temporary mobile human heater awaits.”

She grimaced internally, realizing that she’d worsened her predicament: now they’d be walking into the party looking like some couple who didn’t know when to stop touching.

“Thanks Jace,” she said instead, adding a laugh in an attempt to sound more genuine.

 _And_ she was still wearing the yellow top. It was almost like she was trying to spite Trini.

-

“There’s no way they’re gonna show up.”

“Well, I would think so. Isn’t it rude to show up uninvited?”

Trini took a swig of her beer, choosing to only drink things under 15% to make sure she was still alert enough to keep her parents’ house intact, while Zack did the same, not wanting one of _his_ friends to be responsible for fucking something up.

She watched as the partygoers continued to mingle, making sure no one was breaking any of the rules she’d announced at the start.

It seemed that the party was in full swing now, having started almost two hours ago. Trini was only slightly disappointed that Kim and Jason hadn’t been invited, but it was for the best.

Realizing now that Zack hadn’t answered her, she turned to repeat herself, only to see that he looked _suspiciously_ guilty.

“You invited them?” She asked, annoyed that he didn’t follow the _one_ rule she’d given him-- _don’t invite Jason and Kim_.

“What was I supposed to do, Trini? They’re our friends!” He hastily explained, trying to reason with her, “and there’s no way we could get away with keeping this party a secret! It’d be harder to explain not having invited them at all.”

She sighed. He had a point. “Fine.”

“And,” he went on, “I doubt they’d even come. Didn’t you say Kim fucked up big time? I doubt she’d accept any invitation unless it was from you. So, with that logic, Jason wouldn’t go unless Kim was, so we’re home free!”

Frowning, she had to give it to him. He wasn’t wrong. “Right.”

“Yeah, so just relax-” he started, but then interrupted himself, “-shit.”

“What?” Trini asked, even though she already knew, as if she hadn’t felt the immediate goosebumps from when _she_ walked into the room.

“They just walked in.”

_Of course._

“Shot?”

_Fuck the 15%._

“Yes.”

-

_She’d never been able to keep still when she was nervous._

_Just over an hour ago, she’d sent Trini a text asking her to meet by the pool nearby the mines at sunset, without properly thinking through if it was any of this was a good idea at all._

_Now, she was pacing back and forth, not caring if she got dust on her favourite pair of black boots. She hadn’t even thought about what she was going to_ say, _let alone waited for Trini’s confirmation text._

_Was Trini even going to show up?_

_Her palms started sweating now, thinking about what she would do if Trini_ didn’t _show up. What was she meant to do then? Did it mean there was no longer any chance of fixing this?_

_The sound of footsteps interrupted her train of thought, and Kim felt a wave of relief course through her body._

Right. _Nothing to worry about._

_As quickly as the relief the ex-cheerleader had felt at Trini’s confirmation of attendance had appeared, it soon melted into a feeling of dread at the pit of her stomach._

_Back to square one. What to say?_

_It’d been a week since the conversation in Tommy Oliver’s room, and an entire week since they’d last seen each other._

_“What do you want now, Kim?” Trini’s voice rang out, and Kim flinched at her deadpan tone._

_It was time to make amends, considering that Trini had been skipping classes and training-- the boys could only be oblivious for so long._

_“You came,” she said. It was surreal to see her here, now, in a place where she’d once discussed the idea of running away with a boy when she thought she’d had nothing to lose._

_When she hadn’t known Trini yet._

_The shorter girl stuffed her hands into her jacket pockets roughly, as if the sight of them would offend Kim. “I said I would,” she pointed out._

_“How’re you doing?”_

_“Don’t ask questions you know the answer to,” Trini replied, and Kim fought the sudden familiar urge to run._

_A silence. She gulped, unsure with how to proceed with the conversation, when she couldn’t even remind herself to breathe._

_“Why’d you ask to meet up?” Trini asked, breaking the silence. She was never one to beat around the bush._

_“I…” Kim trailed off._

_Trini waited with a purse in her lips, her patience limited from all the times Kim had tested it._

_“I just wanted to apologize.”_

_When she was met with another silence, Kim glanced up, trying to gauge her reaction. A mistake. To any other person, Trini’s mask was impeccable. The epitome of indifference. But Kim knew better._

_“For… You know.” A slight quiver in her bottom lip. Kim turned away when she noticed her throat bob up and down. “The. Um. Yeah.” She_ really _should’ve thought about what she was going to say._

_“You mean the way you shamelessly took advantage of my feelings for you to cheat on your boyfriend? Who, by the way, is also my friend, too.”_

Well, that was one way of putting it. _“Er… Yeah,” Kim agreed, trying not to visibly recoil at the words. “I wasn’t really thinking.”_

_“Oh, you mean the first time, or the next few times after that?”_

_“Well-”_

_“-What’s your excuse gonna be, this time, Kim? You need attention at all times and I just happened to be there whenever Jason wasn’t around?”_

_“Trini-” She started, reaching for her hand, but the girl in question pulled her hand away before they could make contact._

_“-Or are you gonna play a trauma card? Neglected childhood? Daddy issues? Mommy issues? Never let go of your ‘dark cheerleader side-?”_

_“-It was a mistake,” Kim interrupted, flustered and desperate for her to stop. “All of it.”_

_There was a brief pause, Trini closing and then opening her mouth like a gaping fish._

_“All of that was a mistake to you-?” She turned and chuckled in disbelief, and Kim felt the guilt fill up her insides at the sight of Trini finally crumbling, her face defeated._

_“-I mean-”_

_“-you know what? It’s fine. I get it.” Just as quickly as her facade had broken, it had been replaced again by her mask. Trini was officially gone._

_“I’m sorry, Trini,” Kim repeated, unsure of what she had even intended to say. While it hadn’t all been a mistake, it also hadn’t exactly been on purpose._

_Trini shook her head, shrugging slightly as she turned away from the taller girl. “It’s cool. We’re good.”_

_“Really?”_

_“Yeah,” Trini said, but Kim felt otherwise, “see you tomorrow.”_

_And then she was turning and leaving, and Kim could only watch her go, her chest tighter than it had been before the entire exchange._

_It was like she was the sun and Trini was the night sky, but the sun was setting, and she was swallowing her whole._

_-_

She walked in with Jason’s arm still around her, and Trini’s eyes on her.

“There’s Trini and Zack,” Jason pointed at the drinks table with the hand around her shoulders, and Kim had to resist the urge of shrugging it off, “we should go say hi!”

“Yeah-” she started, but was interrupted by Tommy Oliver’s voice.

“-Jace,” the girl in green greeted him, while acknowledging Kim with a nod, “glad you’re here! I need a new beer pong partner-- Kat’s too fucked.”

He sent Kim an apologetic look, but Kim only nodded, allowing him to go off with the other girl.

She sighed in relief when he disentanged himself from her to join the other players by the table.

After he’d left, she glanced around for the drinks table, only to be reminded that Trini was still there, only, now sans Zack.

It was _unfair_ how good she looked. Her face was tinged slightly pink, like she’d drank too much too fast, but the effect resulted in a slight glow, and Kim felt like even breathing in the same room as her was offensive. To add to that, the shorter girl was also wearing a loose pink jacket, as if she threw this party with the intention of killing Kim.

Dimly, in the back of her mind, she remembered she’d worn a yellow top. How fitting. They seemed to be on the same page.

Internally, she debated with herself if it would be weird to go and say hi. On one hand, things _were ‘_ mended,’ but still weird. On the other, this was a party at _Trini’s_ house. It’d be weirder if she _didn’t_ say hi.

Before she could even decide which sounded option sounded less terrible, the smaller girl had finally noticed Kim staring, and it was clear her decision had been made for her.

Taking a deep breath, she decided to make her way over to the drinks table before she could talk herself out of it.

“Hey,” she said, trying not to sound breathless.

Trini nodded politely at her, “yo.”

“Cool party,” Kim said, trying to pace herself before she reached for a shot.

“Thanks.”

There was an awkward pause. Trini downed her shot quickly, while Kim picked at the strap of her top, before dropping her hand immediately. She didn’t want the other girl to think she was drawing attention to her choice in wardrobe.

Trini broke the silence first, clearing her throat after the sting in her throat faded. “So, um, what’ve you been up to?”

Grateful for something to talk about, Kim almost choked on her own spit before hastily replying, “Jason,” she cringed almost immediately after she said it, “I mean- I’m sorry, I don’t know why I said that.”

“It’s okay.”

It wasn’t. It never was, and Kim knew. But that was their dynamic-- Kim fucking up while Trini took the hits, always settling, always trying to be okay with it all.

So, instead of owning up and acknowledging her guilt, Kim didn’t meet her eyes, too afraid that she’d discover something _wrong_ in them again, like the constellation of her and Trini falling in love.

She was starting to regret her choice in coming tonight.

-

It’d been a few hours since they’d showed up to the party, and roughly ninety-three minutes since Kim and Trini had spoken.

Their interactions had been minimal since the exchange, only stealing glances while the other wasn’t looking.

By now, Kim was slightly buzzed, a very much drunk Jason with his arm around her shoulders as he greeted other partygoers, and she was seriously debating on heading home already, except for the fact that Trini had _just_ been staring at her, Kim only just catching it by a fraction of a second.

“Jaaace,” Kim whined, pulling her boyfriend’s attention back on her.

“Kiiimmy,” he whined back, and she turned to smile at him, with the hope of Trini watching the interaction.

 _Why_ she had wanted the smaller girl to see that, she wasn’t sure. All she knew was that the guilt had dissipated and had been replaced by desperation, and whatever she was trying to do had worked, because Trini was making her way over to the pair of them.

She braced herself, ready for a conversation, or a confrontation, but Trini only looked away at the last second, instead making her way past Kim.

Frowning at her lack of reaction, Kim lightly brushed her palm against Trini’s when she walked past them, all logical and sober thoughts out the window.

“Did you want another beer?” Jason asked, reminding Kim that she’d called his name earlier.

Suddenly, the guilt rushed back, the realization setting in that she’d been thinking about somebody else while her boyfriend only had her best interests in mind.

She tried not to think about the way her hand still burned from where Trini had touched it.

“No,” Kim replied, the smile on her face now long gone.

-

“I need another drink.”

Zack stared down at her incredulously from where he’d been sitting on the arm of her seat, already bored of the game in front of them. “T. Dude. Didn’t you just drink like, half a bottle of rum?”

They’d been sitting around the pool table for about ten minutes now, watching a very uneventful round of pool between two kids from school that Trini didn’t know the names of. _How_ the two of them had garnered such a sizeable crowd, she didn’t know. They didn’t even want to bet any stupid dares.

“That was two hours ago,” she answered simply, as if that’d been enough time to sober up.

He gave her a doubtful look. She was small, that should’ve been enough for the rest of the night.

Trini shrugged. “It’s _my_ party, Taylor.”

“Fine,” he conceded, draining his red solo cup of whatever fruity beverage he’d been drinking, only to pull his flask out from his inside jacket pocket, “just one shot.” He poured the drink into his no longer empty cup, only to hand her half a shot of rum.

She frowned, and was about to argue at the lack of a ‘drink,’ but he interrupted her before she could, his attention already somewhere else.

Following his gaze, Trini found Katherine Hillard at the end of it, otherwise known as the juniors’ homecoming queen, and, right now, the most promising candidate for the role of head cheerleader for the following school year.

“Why don’t you talk to…” He trailed off, and Trini already knew what was coming, but wasn’t quick enough to stop his train of thought, “Kat?”

“Really, Zack?” She wasn’t an idiot. It was pretty clear what he was implying.

“What?” He questioned, and it sounded genuine. Maybe he really hadn’t intended to imply anything.

She shook her head at him. This was definitely something she had to spell out for him, because it was clear _he_ wasn’t bright enough to see the parallels. “You want me to go for the girl who took Kim’s spot on the cheerleading squad, and lives in pink and leather?”

He grinned. “Is that not your type?” _Maybe not so clueless after all._

Choosing not to dignify his reply with a proper response, she glared at him instead.

“I’m just saying-- she fits your credentials, and a little birdy told me she’s gay,” he leaned in and whispered into her ear so that she could feel and smell his drunken breath, “ _out_ _and_ _about_.”

She rolled her eyes and pretended to fan away the stench that had emanated from his mouth, in an attempt to hide that he definitely had her attention now after the _out_ comment.

“Who better than a discount Kim?” He finished, sitting back down, but this time next to her, forcing her out of her seat. Once comfortably seated, he smirked at her, as if he knew what she was thinking.

“Zack, that’s fucked up.”

“Well, she’s making her way over here,” he said, pointing behind her and over her shoulder.

“ _What_?”

Instead of a reply, he pushed her towards Kat, not giving Trini time to regain her thoughts.

She stumbled forward, barely avoiding spilling her drink all over herself before catching her balance in front of the taller blonde cheerleader. “Hi.”

Kat smiled at the action. There was no way she could’ve missed that embarrassing exchange.

“Hi.”

-

Kim had never felt so many negative emotions at once. Her entire body was on fire and it felt like she had just run twelve marathons and could’ve run about twelve more, but she also just wanted to lie down and stare aimlessly at the ceiling for the next eight years, and maybe cry a little bit.

Trini was talking to _Katherine Hillard,_ and Kim _knew_ she shouldn’t have felt jealous, no- she _did not_ feel jealous.

She shut her eyes and tried to think about Jason, her _boyfriend,_ but Kat had her hands all over Trini’s waist, and she’d just leaned over in Trini’s ear to whisper _God-knows-what_ , and Kim _knew_ that was a move that you needed to know before you could even _dream_ of being initiated into the squad (she’d know, she _invented_ that move) and suddenly, she was pushing off the wall she’d been watching from.

Her pace was a cross between a run and a speed walk, and possibly borderline psychotic, but she’d lost her willingness to care when Kat had flipped her hair over her shoulder, exposing the bright yellow bra under her pink tank top.

Without thinking, she’d purposely bumped into Trini, her hand immediately finding the shorter girl’s before the new cheerleader could question it.

This time wasn’t a mistake.

-

Trini shut the door behind them, watching as Kim carelessly knocked down all the products on the bathroom counter into the floor.

Almost immediately, the taller girl turned to Trini with a crazed look in her eyes, and crowded into her space, almost ripping the pink jacket off Trini’s shoulders like she couldn’t get it off fast enough.

She leaned down, and Trini moved to capture her lips with her own, only for Kim to completely avoid her face and ravage her neck as she pleased. It was almost routine-- Kim always had to be in control, always had to be the one setting the pace, always had to be the one to decide the boundaries.

Frankly, Trini had grown tired of it. How was it that Kim could be with Jason, yet still not let Trini even _talk_ to other people?

“C’mon,” Kim groaned, when Trini had gone unresponsive.

It just wasn’t _fair._

Angry, and finally fed up with the ex-head-cheerleader, Trini reversed their roles, flipping their positions so that it was now Kim who was pressed against the washroom counter, while Trini fisted her hands in Kim’s hair, bringing her back up so she could properly kiss her.

It was messy, almost all teeth and barely any lips. Trini’s movements only got rougher and rougher as time passed on, going so far as to grind so hard against Kim that she slid up from her sitting position on the counter and toward the wall, her head knocking softly against the mirror with a slight _thud._

Kim scratched at Trini’s arms, attempting to pull her closer to regain some control over the situation. Old habits die hard, but Trini wasn’t going to give up the thrill of power she finally had so quickly. She caught Kim’s hands in her own, setting them back onto the counter, making it clear that Kim definitely wouldn’t be able to take back the lead this time.

Pulling away from her lips, Trini dipped down and nipped meanly at Kim’s neck, taking a note from Kim’s book. She made sure to leave behind marks, so that Kim couldn’t keep living with no consequences. Jason had to find out one way or another.

She pushed even harder into Kim, like she couldn’t get close enough, and Kim pulled her in impossibly closer, seeming to finally give up her fight to win control.

For a while, Trini lost herself in the moment, selfishly letting herself enjoy the new sensation of being in power. She almost forgot that she was supposed to be angry, that what they were doing was _wrong._

But then, Kim ground back against Trini’s abs, and the heat from the apex of her thighs at the contact signalled for Trini to cease her movements.

“Sorry,” Trini apologized, her breath hot against the shell of Kim’s ear before she pulled away and grabbed her jacket from the floor, “this was all a mistake.”

And then the door shut, and Trini was gone.

-

Guilt was a familiar feeling, but it always rushed in too late.

There was no silver lining this time, no reassurance that there was still another chance waiting for her.

The taste of honey chapstick and alcohol was gone, and Kim found herself tracing over the marks Trini had no doubt left behind on her neck. How she was meant to hide those, she had no idea.

Her shoulders felt cold but she let herself slump against the mirror, her skin raising in little prickles of goosebumps by her shoulder blades.

Sighing, she pulled her tank top strap up from where it’d fallen low on her arm, trying not to focus on the tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes.

How foolish she had to have been to think she could tame the sun itself.

“Kim?” The wrong voice called out, opening the washroom door slowly, “hey, I’ve been looking for you.”

“Jace,” Kim greeted, already subconsciously brushing her hair back around her neck to hide the marks around her neck, “let’s go home.”

He nodded, and extended his hand out to her, so that she could take it, and she couldn’t help but feel like his hand felt _wrong_ in hers.

He led her back out to the party, the music now sounding too loud in Kim’s sensitive ears. Trini was nowhere to be seen.

The red from her dreams was gone completely-- she only saw yellow.

**Author's Note:**

> this took so long 2 write bc angst is !!!!!!!! NO THANK U ygm. but like. it had 2 happen., u cant just make a vid like curious and Not have any fics based off it amen lesbian jesus for blessin us
> 
> thank u for reading!!!!!! pls leave comments and kudos behind bc ik yall avoid angst fics like the plague
> 
> follow me @ivebeenexposed.tumblr.com


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